So far so good! I have been receiving almost daily hands on treatments.....we did a lot over the weekend self-treatments together, hands on and distant treatments. This was great and now I am home and having friends come over and treat me. I appreciate the distant and this gives me the backup support that I really need. Thank you!
Today...this morning ...wednesday....I am going in to the hospital to have my port taken out. It is a plastic thing that they put into my major vein near my collarbone on the left side. The little "hose" goes into my heart where they deliver the chemo therapy! Yuk! It has been creepy to have it in me all this time. They did not take it out before in order to be sure I did not have another reason to use it. So this is a great milestone and I am happy to have it out...but not happy about the procedure.
Joyce is going with me and she will be "holding my hand." For those who are reading this now.....you can hold my etheric hand!
Another milestone of recovery.
More later....when I come back! Phyllis
2011-02-09
2011-01-27
Home from El Paso
I have just arrived home from my teaching trip to El Paso. The Reiki has been fabulous! I made it a priority to have a treatment every day...which I did! And mostly in the mornings which was great because my nights are still not settled...so having a good treatment (sometimes 2 hours) was a life saver. Then I also was in the energy of teaching a First Degree class and a Second Degree class. Both were special...as usual!!! I loved seeing my students from the years past. They are doing well and their Reiki is strong and clear. So wonderful to see the development of a community too!
In the afternoons I was able to have time to visit with some of the students that I taught some years ago and to reconnect in a good way. I had great hosts and they treated me well.
So now my next step is to keep this up at home! Luckily Phil Morgan is arriving tomorrow afternoon and we will have a workshop together at Kenyon Ranch next week.
With all my appreciation for your treatments which are the foundation for my good mind right now.
I appreciate your time and willingness to keep supporting me through this time of ups and downs.
Phyllis
In the afternoons I was able to have time to visit with some of the students that I taught some years ago and to reconnect in a good way. I had great hosts and they treated me well.
So now my next step is to keep this up at home! Luckily Phil Morgan is arriving tomorrow afternoon and we will have a workshop together at Kenyon Ranch next week.
With all my appreciation for your treatments which are the foundation for my good mind right now.
I appreciate your time and willingness to keep supporting me through this time of ups and downs.
Phyllis
2011-01-16
Treatment request
Dear Readers, I have found myself in another state. Lately I have been having periods of really down times. It has not been easy sometimes and there are some good insights that come forth. However, it is getting to be that I am not able to function very well and not with my usual attention.
I went to my Medical Oncologist a few days ago and told her what had been happening. The good news is that my estrogen levels are very low and this is the condition they are looking for to create another margin around the cancer. It is good that I am able to do this on supplements and not her medication. The not so great side effects is what she calls "moodiness." Her solution is anti-depressants, which i am tempted to take because my state of being is deteriorating as the time goes by.
This week I am teaching in El Paso and have the mornings off for 10 days. I am going to schedule treatments every day and get some exercise. Perhaps this will help. I will be staying with a family who is very into exercise. Perhaps I will be influenced!
At the same time, there is a dear friend and Reiki Master colleague who is not doing well. She found she had cancer in her lungs and it has gone to brain tumors. I am sad not to be able to fly to the UK to visit her...and sad that she is most likely going to die before I see her again. I try to keep current and say what I need when I have the chance because one never knows what is going to happen. This came from an experience I had in my twenties. So on one level it is fine...and on another I don't feel finished!
This situation is not helping my state of mind.
I would appreciate renewed efforts around sending me Reiki, especially in my mornings. These seem to be the worst time.
With appreciation,
Phyllis
I went to my Medical Oncologist a few days ago and told her what had been happening. The good news is that my estrogen levels are very low and this is the condition they are looking for to create another margin around the cancer. It is good that I am able to do this on supplements and not her medication. The not so great side effects is what she calls "moodiness." Her solution is anti-depressants, which i am tempted to take because my state of being is deteriorating as the time goes by.
This week I am teaching in El Paso and have the mornings off for 10 days. I am going to schedule treatments every day and get some exercise. Perhaps this will help. I will be staying with a family who is very into exercise. Perhaps I will be influenced!
At the same time, there is a dear friend and Reiki Master colleague who is not doing well. She found she had cancer in her lungs and it has gone to brain tumors. I am sad not to be able to fly to the UK to visit her...and sad that she is most likely going to die before I see her again. I try to keep current and say what I need when I have the chance because one never knows what is going to happen. This came from an experience I had in my twenties. So on one level it is fine...and on another I don't feel finished!
This situation is not helping my state of mind.
I would appreciate renewed efforts around sending me Reiki, especially in my mornings. These seem to be the worst time.
With appreciation,
Phyllis
2011-01-10
Be the Change
This last weekend I had the pleasure of living one of my after cancer dreams. This was to spend a weekend with masters from the local Arizona area at the Kenyon Ranch with the intention of being together in harmony. We came from different forms of practice and different backgrounds intending to meet as one. We did it!
There was a challenge to this. On Saturday morning, our local congresswoman, U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords, was shot as well as several others around her. 5 people died. She is still in critical condition. The man who shot these people seems to be a mixed up man with a wish to have our government feel supportive and "talk straight," I can certainly understand and agree with his wish but not with his way of expressing his frustration, powerlessness, and helplessness.
We found out when we broke for lunch. We had agreed to meet for a session with one of the masters who lead Dances of Universal Peace. She choose dances for us that allowed us to feel our connection, to gather " all people" in our arms, and to express our longing to be there with our Reiki hands. This was a great way to integrate the news and to set a course of compassion for everyone involved. We ended the day feeling as connected as a group could be, holding this paradox that someone else on that day felt so separated from himself that he was able to kill.
Today when I heard the news, reminding me about the minute of silence for the people who have died and the ones who are wounded, i began to feel the sadness come over me. Finally I had to go to bed taking a hot water bottle with me to comfort my neck which had a funny crink in it! I gave myself Reiki, relaxed the muscles in my neck, and slept for a time. When I woke up, I felt better.
After lunch, I recorded a conversation with Susan Mitchell for the radio show. The subject was compassion. It was a good interview and I was able to sort through some of my response to this shock wave. Violence seems to start a wave that ripples out and I was rocked by it.
Imagine how it must be to be in this kind of violence day and night? I cannot. And because of this, I search myself for the understanding of what it must be like for the man who was at the epicenter of this violence. He is a part of me. I am a part of him. We are one.
I am at peace when I write this. But how can I live this? I want to push him out of me and declare that I have nothing of that in me. I only have disgust and disbelief. But I wonder, about the life I wish to lead? How can I include him the in the practice of the precepts? How can I include him in the One?
And this is my challenge. I hold this softly and gently. I pray for us all that our hearts remain open.
i remember the feeling of Saturday night's circle and remember the One.
with trust in all that is happening,
Phyllis
2010-12-24
Christmas and its meaning
It is the 24th of December....and more than Christmas, I remember this as my grandmother Takata's birthday. Each year as this date passes through me, I realize that my gratitude is growing and growing.
I have been, without a doubt, looking back to last year and how I felt then. It was such an effort to get up and move about! My dear friends who had been giving me hands on treatment each day had a great idea....we would all stay in our pajamas and have a breakfast together! It was such fun and I realize, they came to my daily routine! It was so sweet! And then the rest of the day was spent together watching movies and snacking on good things that we brought together.
This year, I have not my usual energy for decorating and getting things together for Christmas, but I am not pushing myself either. This is good! We are having a quiet day tomorrow.....feeding the horses at the Ranch and I have the desire to go out and have a ceremony there. I used to do this when I lived in northern New Mexico. The air/space on the early morning of Christmas is so special somehow.....and I used to drive out to the edge of the canyon there and watch the sun come up....drumming and singing to the day.
This day is like a touch stone each year for me. It is about remembering all the good things that have happened. Enjoying family and friends and generosity. It is about birth and LIFE in a new way. This day is about heart and warmth and comfort. I have grown away from the midnight church services and the story of he manager.....and try to grow away from the madness of spending money! But the spirit of Christmas is with me and I am happy to be sharing this with you, whatever your feelings about Christmas are!
So this is why my gratitude is growing for the gifts that my grandmother has given to the world, to me, and to my family.
She gave these gifts by being herself. This is inspirational. We don't have to be anything but ourselves and the gifts came to those that we love and care for.
I have been, without a doubt, looking back to last year and how I felt then. It was such an effort to get up and move about! My dear friends who had been giving me hands on treatment each day had a great idea....we would all stay in our pajamas and have a breakfast together! It was such fun and I realize, they came to my daily routine! It was so sweet! And then the rest of the day was spent together watching movies and snacking on good things that we brought together.
This year, I have not my usual energy for decorating and getting things together for Christmas, but I am not pushing myself either. This is good! We are having a quiet day tomorrow.....feeding the horses at the Ranch and I have the desire to go out and have a ceremony there. I used to do this when I lived in northern New Mexico. The air/space on the early morning of Christmas is so special somehow.....and I used to drive out to the edge of the canyon there and watch the sun come up....drumming and singing to the day.
This day is like a touch stone each year for me. It is about remembering all the good things that have happened. Enjoying family and friends and generosity. It is about birth and LIFE in a new way. This day is about heart and warmth and comfort. I have grown away from the midnight church services and the story of he manager.....and try to grow away from the madness of spending money! But the spirit of Christmas is with me and I am happy to be sharing this with you, whatever your feelings about Christmas are!
So this is why my gratitude is growing for the gifts that my grandmother has given to the world, to me, and to my family.
She gave these gifts by being herself. This is inspirational. We don't have to be anything but ourselves and the gifts came to those that we love and care for.
2010-12-04
Alooooha
Well, I got home from NYC with the start of a kind of cold. I feel it was simple exhaustion. Something that my body does when there is nothing left. I stayed in bed for two days...then had to get up and out to prepare to come to Hawaii! Who did this schedule? Me! And it was not a good schedule for my body...but I have survived and am really looking at my next year's schedule to make sure I have GAPS!
I have recovered my energy and the cold like symptoms are gone. I have rested instead of being on the beach.....I have rested instead of lying in the sun....I have rested. And so I am much much better.
My time at the Four Seasons has been good and I am learning to be a practitioner! Working out of the Spa here and teaching a class to some members of the Spa staff has been a great experience! I see where I am not in training to sit for four treatments in a row! Tomorrow I have a full schedule and I am wondering....can I do it! Well, we will see!
The organizational meeting concerning the Ranch are continuing and if you have some moments to send me Reiki, I would appreciate it! The more clear I am .....the easier everything will be! Thank you for your continued support on this project.
I see that it will support my new life style in so many ways...that I am astonished that I did not see them before!
Aloha: In the Hawaiian language means affection, love, peace, compassion, mercy, hello, and good bye. What a wonderful word. And it is said with the heart and a lingering lilt to the voice.
Aloha ......Phyllis
I have recovered my energy and the cold like symptoms are gone. I have rested instead of being on the beach.....I have rested instead of lying in the sun....I have rested. And so I am much much better.
My time at the Four Seasons has been good and I am learning to be a practitioner! Working out of the Spa here and teaching a class to some members of the Spa staff has been a great experience! I see where I am not in training to sit for four treatments in a row! Tomorrow I have a full schedule and I am wondering....can I do it! Well, we will see!
The organizational meeting concerning the Ranch are continuing and if you have some moments to send me Reiki, I would appreciate it! The more clear I am .....the easier everything will be! Thank you for your continued support on this project.
I see that it will support my new life style in so many ways...that I am astonished that I did not see them before!
Aloha: In the Hawaiian language means affection, love, peace, compassion, mercy, hello, and good bye. What a wonderful word. And it is said with the heart and a lingering lilt to the voice.
Aloha ......Phyllis
2010-11-25
Happy Thanks....giving
Dear Friends and support team! It has been weeks since I have written to you by this BLOG> And I have been thinking about you and wanting to get on line! Today here in the U.S....we are celebrating Thanksgiving. This is a day when we come together with family and friends to give Thanks......See what blessings we have every day of our lives.....and acknowledge them! So this is my chance to say ....You have been a blessing in my life....especially in the last 18 months...and you keep my on my path of healing, on all levels.
Right now, my physical level of healing is pretty high. The supplements I am taking are raising the internal balance of my body to a healthier level than before I began the cancer treatment. I am looking at deeper issues on the emotional and spiritual level to care for other issues....such as my weight and body awareness. This is going well.....though I want it to be faster...but I am learning to see what is...and accept it! This is a huge one for me.
I had a report from my nathropathic oncologist a few weeks ago...while still in Russia....and my estrogen level is good...below what they are looking for....which is Good! There are genetic markers that are favorable for continued health. And the level of vitamin D is good now....which is a critical one for many different reasons.
It took me about two weeks to recover from the trip from Moscow to Green Valley! It was a long one and I, again, realized how much I had put my body through all those years of traveling! What a time of insight and becoming clear that I will not push myself again to this point.
So the next long trip will be October 2011 to Almaty Kazackstan. It is a completion of some work I have started there. I am happy to do this trip but the scheduling is difficult. How to stay for enough time to be able to rest between events while not stringing out the days and compiling expenses there. The last trip to Russia was good financially only because very generous masters donated their apartments for me to stay in between the events, and many supported me by driving me around, giving me money for internet services and phone cards, and to pay for my meals. It is alot to receive and I feel I did it well. Such open hearts inspire open hearted receiving. Sometimes it was not easy.....but I managed!
Each year, I will prepare myself for a long trip...until I cannot do them any more. I hope to go to South American again and to Europe again. Then I will see how I feel.
Will I recover enough to resume my life before cancer. I hope not. Because it was not a healthy life for me. And I loved it! So many places to see and admire! So many wonderful beautiful people to meet and embrace into my life! So many sunrises and sunsets to know that the earth is my home....and is at once the same everywhere...and different everywhere.
I am now in New Jersey just across the river (?) from New York City with some of my family for Thanksgiving! This is a great blessing too. They have been so supportive and caring for me these last months.....and I am fully into my family now for the first time in my life.
This journey has been a gift....not one I made up because it seemed to be the "right" thing to do....but one that was just so.
Reiki brings us all wake-up calls. It is good to listen and to allow life to show you the way. This is one of the gifts that Reiki has brought to me.
In this time of giving Thanks......I am filled with gratitude and peace.
Thank you for being a part of it!
Phyllis
Right now, my physical level of healing is pretty high. The supplements I am taking are raising the internal balance of my body to a healthier level than before I began the cancer treatment. I am looking at deeper issues on the emotional and spiritual level to care for other issues....such as my weight and body awareness. This is going well.....though I want it to be faster...but I am learning to see what is...and accept it! This is a huge one for me.
I had a report from my nathropathic oncologist a few weeks ago...while still in Russia....and my estrogen level is good...below what they are looking for....which is Good! There are genetic markers that are favorable for continued health. And the level of vitamin D is good now....which is a critical one for many different reasons.
It took me about two weeks to recover from the trip from Moscow to Green Valley! It was a long one and I, again, realized how much I had put my body through all those years of traveling! What a time of insight and becoming clear that I will not push myself again to this point.
So the next long trip will be October 2011 to Almaty Kazackstan. It is a completion of some work I have started there. I am happy to do this trip but the scheduling is difficult. How to stay for enough time to be able to rest between events while not stringing out the days and compiling expenses there. The last trip to Russia was good financially only because very generous masters donated their apartments for me to stay in between the events, and many supported me by driving me around, giving me money for internet services and phone cards, and to pay for my meals. It is alot to receive and I feel I did it well. Such open hearts inspire open hearted receiving. Sometimes it was not easy.....but I managed!
Each year, I will prepare myself for a long trip...until I cannot do them any more. I hope to go to South American again and to Europe again. Then I will see how I feel.
Will I recover enough to resume my life before cancer. I hope not. Because it was not a healthy life for me. And I loved it! So many places to see and admire! So many wonderful beautiful people to meet and embrace into my life! So many sunrises and sunsets to know that the earth is my home....and is at once the same everywhere...and different everywhere.
I am now in New Jersey just across the river (?) from New York City with some of my family for Thanksgiving! This is a great blessing too. They have been so supportive and caring for me these last months.....and I am fully into my family now for the first time in my life.
This journey has been a gift....not one I made up because it seemed to be the "right" thing to do....but one that was just so.
Reiki brings us all wake-up calls. It is good to listen and to allow life to show you the way. This is one of the gifts that Reiki has brought to me.
In this time of giving Thanks......I am filled with gratitude and peace.
Thank you for being a part of it!
Phyllis
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